Also GODDAMN YOU FOR LINKING THIS WHILE MY ROOMMATE IS ASLEEP. I can feel my ribs fracturing.

And oh god, all the euphemisms he uses are just... *face fault* The inside of his brain is like a bad porn fic. "Man juice"?! "Shrunken meat"?!? ahahahaha whyyyyyy

And of course, the classic line: ~*~*~THIS IS MY JUSTICE~*~*~ pffft hahahaha